PREVIOUS: Ennea humor #3

BOOK: Enneagram Cats of Muir Beach

(⬅️ World Costumes by Phillip Martin)

Enneagram TYPE Humor
❥ Why didn’t the counter-phobe #6 cross the road?
‘Cause she’s not chicken.

❥ How many phobic 6s does it take to change a light bulb?
Answer A: Five people – One to say “OMG the light bulb went out. HELP!,”
One to say “OMG you’re right, this is horrible, we need help!”
One to go consult an expert on how to change light bulbs
One to screw it in
One to stand by the phone ready to call 911 in case the one screwing it in gets electrocuted

Answer B: No, it takes Six people.
❥ One to stand there & grumble, “Rats, I’ve been telling them for ages this frakkin’ bulb was ready to blow, but would they listen to me? Oh noooo! I knew this would happen!”
❥ One to get several references on the proper way to change light bulbs (which he already has on hand because he too was sure the damned bulb would blow at some point & wanted to be prepared when it happened).

❥ One to go get a light bulb from her light bulb stash. (She’d stocked up on light bulbs just in case.)
❥ One to screw in the bulb.
❥ One to stand there and tell the one screwing in the bulb to be careful of X, Y, and Z.
❥ One to stand there ready to call 911 in case the one screwing it in gets electrocuted or falls off the ladder. That ladder doesn’t look too great. He / she’s been telling them for ages they need to replace that rickety ladder before someone gets hurt.

The DEVIL’s ADVOCATE
Some famous 6s: Woody Allen, Candace Bergen, Mel Gibson, Hitler, Bob Newhart, Nixon, Julia Roberts, Gen. Colin Powell, Robert Redford, Bruce Springsteen, Bruce Willis
EXP:
Gina’s one-time #6 BFF needed her ‘sacred cows’ to make her feel safe-er. She was outraged when she heard that JFK was a womanizer or that the ‘church’ hid the truth about their pedophiles….

Twisted Affirmation
“Only a lack of imagination saves me from immobilizing myself with imaginary fears”

Fun Quote: Emo Phillips
I was walking home one night & a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In Morse code.

Walking in to a party: Check to see if the chandelier looks like it might fall down & hurt someone

The EPICURE
Some famous 7s: George W. Bush, J.F.K., Richard Feynman (physicist), Magic Johnson, Jay Leno, Mozart, Babe Ruth, Barbra Streisand, Robin Williams
EXP:
Rita’s #7 husband never shuts up – when he’s upset, when he’s planning, when he’s bragging…. & you can’t stop him – he’s like the Energizer bunny!

Twisted Affirmation
“I am willing to make the mistakes if someone else is willing to learn from them”

Fun Quote: Mayor Marion Barry
Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the lowest crime rates in the country.

Walking in to a party: Puts a lampshade on their head & start telling jokes

NEXT: Humor #5