SITEs: • Power of Vulnerability”, Brene Brown – a TED Talk
QUOTE: “Unexpressed emotions will never die. They are buried alive and will come forth later in uglier ways.” ~ Sigmund Freud
1. Emotional INTELLIGENCE (E.I., also called E.Q.) refers to our ability to understand & use emotional information to guide our thinking & behavior.
• The popular field of Positive Psychology is sometimes used to justify pushing away ‘unfriendly’ emotions. This suits many people who don’t want deal with them.
▶︎ However “no matter how “dark”, Es are natural expressions of being human. They all have a message that will ultimately lead to greater clarity, if acknowledged & contemplated….. (From :”Why Feeling Bad is Good“)
This includes USING:
• conflict as an opportunity to grow closer to others
• humor & play to relieve stress
• nonverbal communication effectively thru body language
(IMAGE from children’s movie 2015)
▫︎ Empathy : understand emotional perspective/ experiences of others, especially when different from ours
▫︎ Handling relationships : use info about Self & others to respond appropriately in social situations by developing healthy interpersonal skill
▫︎ Managing : act appropriately about any Es that occur in a situation
▫︎ Motivation : use self-control to channel Es toward a goal
▫︎ Self-awareness : recognize when & what emotions occur
▷ Researchers have developed tests to measure E.I.
• People with high E.I. have greater mental health, show greater job performance, & usually work well in cooperative situations, being good at motivating & managing others
• People with low E.I. have low(er) self-esteem, often misinterpret emotional signals, have trouble in relationships, & are not as motivated to cooperate or perform well at work
KEEP IN MIND that WE:
• can experience Emotions but not act on them at all
• can have our Es & find the right place to ‘get them out’
• can change how we feel emotionally (E) by coming to an aha! moment, or by mentally (T) understanding what’s going on with us (A)
• will notice Es shifting from pain to discomfort – then pleasure – when hearing a kind word or being with any accepting, comforting person
2. Emotional BALANCE – Since Emotion is mental energy, we can learn to identify & experience our energy level in the present moment, to see if we’re operating at a surplus or deficit. It’s not a stable state, but can slide around throughout the day.
Levels are from least to best :
f. Depletion – feeling tired & stressed most or all of the time, with depression, anger & anxiety
e. Break-even – just getting by, with a few highs, but mostly lows, & sometimes really down. Often under stress, with some breaks
d. Moderate emotional health (e.h.) – barely staying ahead of problems, & often falling a little behind. There is some energy for working to build your strengths & reduce drains
c. Fair e.h. – There’s a lot going for you – with healthy beliefs & action patterns. Still some energy drains to be worked on
b. Good e.h. – close to “the top of your game.” You add energy to the lives of others, & participation in any project is an asset. You greatly benefit too when helping others by sharing knowledge & skills
a. Excellent e.h. – a fortunate & blessed position in life. Energy flows freely from within & all around you. There is great freedom – to choose how you use your abundant energy, as well as responsibility to give back to the world.
TAPE: Nurturing Your Inner Child.
🔅 “Constructing Artificial Emotions – A Design (thought) Experiment” – online games to bring up suppressed Es
• “Emotions Analytics – a new field of E. communications” identifying Es via vocal intonations (iTune app)