PREVIOUS: Growth #1

SITE: 6 Things Every Extrovert Secretly Has To Deal With,
An Extrovert’s Lament, An Introvert’s Response’ ~ Sophia Dembling
•  7 things Introverts should know about Extroverts’ & vice-versa

Accept being “slow to warm”
This is a temperament style, expressed as:
– standing back to get a read on social situations before participating
– being a little suspicious of new people, getting to know them rather than automatically trusting
– your warmth & friendliness are mainly for people you know & trust

Identify anything which over-stimulates you. Once you know what drains you, avoid or minimize exposure, or find ways work around them:
• Severely irritated by loud commercials
• Huge store with too many option (‘Bed, Bath & Beyond‘)
• Interrupted to make a decision when trying to concentrate
• Too many emails, social media posts…..
• Forced to go in & out of social mode too often (work projects vs meetings)
• Stadiums or concert halls full of screaming, clapping extroverts
• Too many people on the sidewalk you’re trying to navigate

• Noisy family gatherings….
Learning physiological & emotional self-regulation strategies will help to recover quickly after being stressed. (Resilience posts) // (14 Stress relief tips)

Accept unpleasant but constructive feedback
No matter which type you are, it’s not healthy to absorb everyone’s arbitrary reactions, since most have noting to do with you & some are just mean. However, very sensitive people with lower self-esteem are afraid to hear anything other than positive comments, limiting their growth options.

However, if you have good friends, & they accept you fully, they can be the safest people to help identify any problems they see in your thinking or actions, & offer solutions. They want you to be the best you can, so evaluate their info, & if it suits you – use it to your benefit

Take time to recover from disappointments
All of life includes setbacks from time to time, & this includes the path to success. When things don’t work out as expected or you would like, as a positive Introvert you can be patient & fair to yourself. First take the time to get over the frustration, anger & sadness. Then you can assess what happened – what’s your responsibility & what’s not, without self-recrimination

Accept ‘non-reward’ outcomes
It can be things like delays that require patience, or sometimes it’s about getting no response at all – to a text, a call, a biz proposal ….. Understand that not getting what you want – right away, or at all – is not punishment, & do NOT take them as personal rejections. Other people may be away, busy, ignorant or just jerks. And in business, some won’t know how or can’t use what you’re offering

Remember that ‘Delay is OK” & “Man’s rejection is God’s protection”
(Tips for Not Personalizing Rejection)

Ask an Extrovert to explain their world
Understanding Es can allow you to interact with them better (when it’s important to you) – even though it’s not always your preferred type to spend time with.

: Extroverts reach out to the world & look for feedback. Is appreciate positive comments, like on a blog or FB, but trying to connect feels exhausting so they don’t usually bother. Work on developing personal strategies that don’t tax you, but allow for positive relationships

Be open to other people’s ideas
Is have a very active internal world, with some great ideas. Since you’re already busy processing a lot, getting external ones (especially unsolicited) may easily be too much, which can make you cranky.
By understanding & accepting the need to limit your energy drain, you can pay attention to feeling put-upon, & set a boundary by waiting until you feel OK before responding.
You can always explain your style, so you can still listen to others (which Is are good at anyway), but only when you’re ready. You never know – their comments & insights may be useful, or at least interesting

NEXT: Growth #3

4 thoughts on “GROWTH for INTROVERTS (Part 2)

  1. DT, I wrote down your suggestions (from the blog) for how to heal and grow away from the NI… “Develop a strong clear voice of our own that we can follow,” was the first and it just dawned on me that that this is actually being worked out and exercised in the the L/R hand writing. That’s actually a news flash to me… it really changes how I see and will approach that exercise.

    Best, Dan

    Sent from my iPhone



  2. I just realized that I have some bad stuff around codependency going on for me… Lori left on vacation and I just became so incredibly relaxed. I need to look at this.

    Sent from my iPhone



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