ACoAs – HUMILITY (Part 2)


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THE MORE SELF-ESTEEM
the more humility!

PREVIOUS: Arrogance vs HUMILITY (2a)

SITES: ‘’HUMILITY – the most beautiful word in the English Language’’

INTELLECTUAL HUMILITY (extensive)

 


MARKERS
re. ONESELF
THEY:
• know their inner worth, not depending on out-performing others, or having to always be ’the first, the best, the most…. ’
• don’t have to frantically chase some intangible or unrealistic degree of importance, success, fame or power

• have an honest, accurate assessment of their talents, limits & areas that need improving. Can admit mistakes, & ask for forgiveness
• have a clear perspective of reality, respecting their place in whatever context they’re in
• can handle frustrating situations with a genuine sense of peace, since they respond, rather than react, to life’s challenges. Able to control their temper
ARE:
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• able to value but not spoil themselves (to every whim of the WIC). Humble self-respect is not attracted to superficial or unhealthy behavior

• good for the sake of being good, admitting they’re as human as everyone else
• OK with being an ordinary/ average person (even when ‘special’, gifted, ‘important’), not needing to be part of some ‘in crowd’ to feel acceptable
ARE:
• teachable – assuming there’s always more to learn about & from all PPT
• courteous, respectful, not pretentious, not boastful or gloating about their accomplishments
• happy to work behind the scenes when required or appropriate, knowing their work is as important as any done in the spotlight
• Willing to yield the right to be right. Do not demand their rights

MARKERS re. OTHERS
ARE:

• motivated to help people, aware that others have needs too
• compassionate & look for the best in others (realistically). Give others the benefit of the doubt
• able & willing to forgive others, letting go of grudges & bitterness
• comfortable with others’ success. H prevents embarrassing themselves in competitive situations
THEY: 
• know they need others, so allow themselves to be open & vulnerable rather than closed & ‘distant’
• show honest interest in others, by asking about their lives & accomplishments
• treat each person as someone of value, regardless of position in society, profession, age or economic status
• don’t pre-judge others’ behavior – knowing that everyone has their own reasons for doing things (that are annoying), even if they don’t know or never find out what those are
THEY:
• ask Qs & love dialogue (not assume they know), & use conversation to explore new worlds
• speak simply, not trying to manipulate or trip others up
• ALSO put energy & effort into listening
• don’t gossip, especially about faults they see in others
• respect those in authority, & pray for them to have wisdom

Social Activism: One form H is in the area of reform, such as in thhelp otherse 2013 workshop by Melanie Marie Tervalon “Cultural Humility: Working in Partnership with Families & Communities”.
Included topics were: Reversing health disparities in the US / Using the tools of cultural competence & cultural humility at work

In Business: Humility is studied as a multi-dimensional trait, which includes awareness, self-understanding, openness & perspective ability. People with these qualities are valued because they tend to be more generous, selfless & altruistic

• Jim Collins, in “Built To Last: Successful Habits of Visionary Companies” (1994), says humility is a key ingredient at the highest level of executive ability. “Humility + Will = Level 5 leaders, who are a study in duality – modest and willful, shy and fearless, patient yet express fierce resolve.” (MORE….)

Arrogant leaders can do well in business, but rarely create lasting relationships because they doesn’t inspire loyalty & trust. They often find themselves surrounded by users who are all too happy to take advantage of the egotist’s ruthless & obsessive need to ‘make good’, but will jump ship at the first sign of trouble

humble leadersConfident leaders also succeed, but not at the expense of others. They have broader spheres of influence, attract better talent, inspire more confidence, loyalty & respect. Truly H people are quietly self-assured, giving them more determination & commitment

Humble LEADER come from a position of strength, & are more persuasive. They HAVE the:
• courage to set aside personal gain to benefit others
• character to respond charitably when attacked
• candor to be honest, & ability to change course if necessary (MORE….)

SITEs: 3 Reasons to Be Humble: People, Agility, and Growth”, re. entrepreneurs
Humility: The Foundation Value of Innovation Leadership”

NEXT: 4 Parenting styles (Part 1)

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