ACoAs: DIS-comfort & Comfort (Part 3e)


in my comfort zone!

PREVIOUS: Discomfort/Comfort #5a

SITE: <—- CHART & All about Comfort Zones

“Being Comfortable in your own skin”  (Women)

QUOTE: “If we are happy within ourselves, we don’t accept or demand that our partner should fulfill every need. We need to be comfortable with our own company.”~ Nathaniel Branden


INNER COMFORT is protected & maintained by healthy attitudes & actions. The goal is to live well, to the best of our ability ODAT (one-day-at-a-time) – never to seek perfection, since it does not exist.  It is liberating, allowing many other wonderful opportunities & relationships to occur. REVIEW what it includes::
— Understand what makes you come alive – respect it, protect it. Create a life you love living.  Hone your intuition.
— Love who you are! With each year – celebrate, don’t hate.
— Find a career / a life/ a passion you fall madly in love with

— Step away from your childhood (home, friends, town) & explore the world.
— Never speak negatively about yourself to others. Stop apologizing. Recognize the harm of being your own worst critic and find a healthy balance
— Become comfortable with your own company without using technology as a crutch. Become comfortable with silence.
— Accept imperfections, yours & others’, while striving for excellence. Maintain an air of mystery
— Admit all needs. Embrace your unique qualities
— Make laughter a bigger part of your life.
<—–CHARTSelf-awareness exercises explained

— Set goals to strive toward.  Create a life schedule that includes time for hard work and productivity, as well as regularly pampering & self-rejuvenation
— Give of your talents & time comfortably, not for recognition or praise, but because you have something to contribute
— Stop trying to fix everything especially the impossible

— Stop tolerating! Stop trying to impress others
— Tactfully walk away from people who will never understand social skills=older
— Realize that relationship status doesn’t determine one’s contentment, rather a content person determines their own contentment
— Spend time with people who make you feel good
BOOK: Enhancing Social Skills in Older Adults, 

— Think of yourself as a beautiful person. Honor your strengths.
— Think positively. Speak with confidence. Express your creativity
— Become an insatiable sponge for knowledge. Dream big & out loud
— See each day is an opportunity to grow & evolve. Keep a gratitude journal
— Take time out to reflect, process & feel. Pray, meditate, read Scripture

— Treat your body with respect & take care of physical needs. “Like your body” (women) . Exercise, walk, dance…..
— Learn the art of dressing your body and for your life. Look confident to feel confident   ( Modified from:  Be C. in your Skin and Comfortable Woman)

Mental Exercise as reminder & re-enforcement:visualize
Give yourself 5 minutes of loving kindness every day. You’ll feel an inner softness develop as you keeping practicing. Place your hands over your heart & say :
“May I be safe / May I be happy / May I be healthy /May I live with ease”

Say it 4x in a soft & gentle tone, aloud or silently. Then gently direct your attention to any part of you that feels disconnected & say 4x each: “May that part be filled with loving kindness” & “May my whole body be filled with loving kindness”. End by repeating:
“May I be safe, May I be happy, May I be healthy, May I live with ease.”  (MORE….)

The AA Promises:

  1. If we are painstaking about this phase of our development, we will be amazed before we are halfway through.
  2. We are going to know a new freedom and a new happiness.
  3. We will not regret the past nor wish to shut the door on it.
  4. We will comprehend the word serenity, and we will know peace.
  5. No matter how far down the scale we have gone, we will see how our experience can benefit others.
  6. That feeling of uselessness and self-pity will disappear.
  7. We will lose interest in selfish things and gain interest in our fellows.
  8. Self-seeking will slip away.
  9. Our whole attitude and outlook upon life will change.
  10. Fear of people and of economic insecurity will leave us.
  11. We will intuitively know how to handle situations which used to baffle us.
  12. We will suddenly realize that God is doing for us what we could not do for ourselves.


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