“33 Things I’ve learned” (Part 2)

communicating

PREVIOUS : 33 Things, #1

IMPORTANT NOTE:
The original list is not available any more. There are 10 other sites under this title – each different.

🔺These 33 are still worth reading — they have more substance.

🔹 “Things”are listed by topic, not in numbered order.

COMMUNICATION
2: If you speak the truth, be prepared to be attacked & ridiculed.
This is done to keep everyone in the “normal box.” To keep things under control & give everyone a mask. If you speak the truth through actions or words, people will be threatened. Those in power who feel threatened will do whatever it takes to silence you. This is where the judgments, labels & forced isolation come from

4: How well your message is received depends on how you deliver the message.
The world is full of people in power who know nothing. If you feel what’s going on is wrong, your attitude & responses will determine if people listen.

7: It’s not rScreen Shot 2016-05-31 at 6.20.53 PMeally about what you say but how you make other people feel.
If you believe in someone or something, don’t let anyone or anything stand in your way. You may change someone’s life by believing in them.

14: Do not ever leave words unsaid.
Speak from your heart in each moment. Every moment is precious. Tell people the greatness you see in them. It takes nothing away from you. In fact, you grow from it.

24: Fierceness & toughness are not always loud. 
Sometimes it’s timing. It is not what you say but when you say it. The best way to know when & what advice to give if any, is easy, but only if you’re truly listening. Don’t force it, timing is everything

OTHER PEOPLE
3: Just because a group of seemingly “educated” people say things are true does not mean they’re right. If there is one person against the group, they may be the only one that’s not willing to go along with the community lie. Sometimes, the teachers are wrongScreen Shot 2016-05-31 at 9.22.53 PM.png

6: There are many people in this world that have it much worse than you can possibly imagine.
There’s serious abuse & damage being done to kids, which will affect them & those they come in contact with the rest of their life. It is going on right now – a great deal of deep sadness & pain

8: Hurt people hurt people.
You have to love yourself first, or you’ll hurt others unintentionally. Monsters are created by other monsters. People who are very sad, especially as children, can do damage to the world. It doesn’t mean they’re bad people. It means they’re acting out their pain

22: You’ll never help anyone by punishing them.
Those who attack others usually have the most to hide. Loving is a sign of strength. To see someone for who they are, despite everyone what everyone else says, is a special person. If you ever have decision-making power over someone’s life – get to know them.

Don’t ever base it on what others say, because they have their own biases & agendas. If someone gossips a lot, they have a lot to hide. If you sit in silence while they gossip, you’re an active participant. Gossip & trash talk is not harmless, it destroys character. Punishment never works for an illness.

25: Appearance means nothing at all.
People at the top can be much, much sicker than so-called “sick” people. Screen Shot 2016-05-31 at 9.35.15 PMWhat others say a crazy person looks like is different than the truth. Don’t be swayed of by others’ opinions. What we see in others, good & bad, is a reflection of what we like or dislike about ourselves.

27: Labels are destructive.
People are not their illness, & no one fits the book pattern. Do not treat the illness. Treat the patient. What helps the most is love

28:  Sometimes, people live up to the hype
When the student is ready, the teacher will appear. Words can change people. But they must be pure, genuine & come from truth.

NEXT: ACoAs & Confusion (Part 1)

“33 Things I’ve learned” (Part 1)

Process

PREVIOUS: Permission to Leave

IMPORTANT NOTE:
The original list is not available any more. There are 10 other sites under this title – each different.

🔺These 33 are still worth reading — they have more substance.

🔹 “Things”are listed by topic, not in numbered order.

IDENTITY
1: If you are different, you will be separated & labeled.

It ‘s ok if you’re lonely & feel different. That doesn’t mean something’s wrong with you. In fact it’s a sign you’re on the right path if you do not fit in.
People in power aren’t always the wisest ones. It’s ok to question authority.Screen Shot 2016-05-31 at 6.49.44 PM

5: Stay true to yourself, even if it upsets others & they reject you.
The person who suffers the most from being someone that others want you to be, is you. What’s in your heart is all that’s real. Embrace who you are in your heart. Show the world that person. That person is beautiful.

30: Do not believe your own thoughts sometimes, they may come from other people.
Your False Self is just that, false. Acceptance comes first. You can change yourself only after you accept yourself

RECOVERY / GROWTH
12: When you’re silent, sit still & deal with emotions, only then will the answers come.
Then can you move forward. The only way out is through. You can not escape pain, which isn’t aways a bad thing. Things that seem great at the time can end up hurting you. Withhold judgment & let things play out. You can spend your whole life running from your pain. In the end, all you get is being tired, having spent a whole life running but not living.

15: It is hard to give love when you’re in pain. But try it, & watch the miracle. If you give love away, love will come back. You will get what you need, if & when you’re prepared for it. If you start to heal yourself & be good to others, regardless of your pain, great things – even miracles – start to happen. You’ll be amazed at what the world gives you.

 16: Where youScreen Shot 2016-05-31 at 6.32.40 PM end usually depends on where you start.
We need to equalize things for people that start off life with less opportunity. Those with privilege need to stop acting like they are on 3rd base because they hit a triple, when in fact they were born on 3rd base.

We have to stop penalizing people because they have less resources, & give everyone the same opportunity – or stop claiming we’re the land of opportunity when we’re not.

18: Living for others’ approval will kill you inside
Buying & accumulating things is not the answer. You’ll walk around depressed because you’re living someone else’s dream for you.

20: When you make someone the center of your world for the moment you’re with them, you can save their life.  You can change the world by simply being present with someone in pain.
Taking time with people. Listening to them is what ‘s important.

21: Lessons will repeat themselves until you finally learn what you’re supposed to. There are lots of ways to try escaping from yourself. Anger, alcohol, drugs, food, gambling, other people, self-harm, drugs…. How many have you tried?

29: Little things add up to big things
When trying to change things, patience is crucial. Systems don’t change fast. First, listen & observe. Pay attention to small things & details, so you gain credibility & build up through small things. You lose credibility if all you do is fight. You don’t need to fight all day, every day. Pick your battlesScreen Shot 2016-05-31 at 6.39.15 PM.png

31: If you want to help people, walk with them, not above them.
Stay in the senior slow lane of life. Let people rush by you if they want. Patience & moving with people is how you help them. Even if you get in a position of power, there’s more corruption at the top.

NEXT: 33 Things I’ve learned (Part 2)