PREVIOUS: Growth #1

SITE: ‘6 Things Every Extrovert Secretly Has To Deal With’,

• An Extrovert’s Lament, An Introvert’s Response’ ~ Sophia Dembling
•  7 things Introverts should know about Extroverts’ & vice-versa

HELPFUL SUGGESTIONS (cont.)
5. Accept unpleasant but constructive FEEDBACK
No matter which MBTI type you are, it’s not healthy to absorb everyone else’s arbitrary reactions, since most have noting to do with you & some are just mean. However, very sensitive people with lower self-esteem are afraid to hear anything other than positive comments, limiting their growth options.

Even so, if you have good friends, & they accept you fully, they can be the safest people to help identify any problems they see in your thinking or actions, & offer solutions. They want you to be the best you can, so evaluate their info, & if it suits you – use it to your benefit

6. Adopt a “GROWTH Mindset”
It’s the positive belief that you can get better at your chosen activities, rather than that your abilities are limited & ‘fixed’. EXP : “I can get better at networking.”
There’s lots of research that shows people with a growth mindset are more successful. Recognize you don’t always need to be outstanding at everything, only use the knowledge you already have & persevere. REPEAT : “I know what I know – but can’t know everything” & remember – “Progress not Perfection”! (More….)

ASK an Extrovert to explain how their world works. Understanding Es can allow you to interact with them better (when it’s important to you) – even though it’s not always your preferred type to spend time with.

EXP: Extroverts reach out to the world & look for feedback. Is appreciate positive comments on a blog or FB, but trying to make the connection themself feels exhausting, so they don’t usually bother. Work on developing personal strategies that don’t tax you, but allow for positive relationships

7. Be OPEN to other people’s ideas
Is have a very active internal world, with some great ideas. Since you’re already busy processing a lot, getting external ones (especially unsolicited) may be way too much, which can make you cranky.
By knowing & accepting the need to limit your energy drain, you can pay attention when feeling put-upon, & set a boundary by waiting until you feel OK before responding.
You can always explain your style, so you can still listen to others (which Is are good at anyway), but only when you’re ready. You never know – their comments & insights may be useful, or at least interesting

8. Find ways to FUNCTION well in the world that doesn’t require acting like an E.
You can collaborate with a few others in ways that don’t over-stimulate you. Take your time to reflect & digest, accepting your need to mull things over for a long while, before taking action. Understand yourself well enough so you know when it’s best to go with your natural tendency, & times when it benefits you to (temporarily) override it.

EXP: DO something you’ve been wanting to for a while, rather than thinking some more about it. Procrastination may be insecurity, or worry about future performance & social pressures that can come with success. Instead of obsessing about potential problems, consider all the possibly wonderful outcomes.
It’ll turn out well enough if you just “Do it, but do it gently”. (Review  info re.“BIS ” in Part 1)

9. Go BEYOND your Comfort Zone
Naturally, you’ll be able to connect with others more easily when doing something you enjoy. However, Is are often criticized for sticking to ‘boring’ activities (lectures, book groups, quiet dinners….). While these are actually great ways to meet like-minded people, it’s okay to go a little out of your comfort zone, by trying different ways to interact, as well as other kinds of events. (MBTI groups at MeetUp.com, & others)

In any large group where you don’t know everyone, your natural tendency is to hang back & just listen, rather than including yourself in conversations. BUT you have a lot to say. Take a small risk & add something you know about, or ask an interested question. You may connect with someone as interesting as yourself!

NEXT: Growth #3