PREVIOUS: Fake Friends

SITE:  BENEFITS of LAUGHTER

• The ART of…. 24 Adult Friendships

Everyone needs friends – for emotional support, companionship, checks on our behavior, & to share & recall life experiences with

1. HEALTHY
✦ Someone who is able to trust others in a realistic way is someone who’s comfortable with their own vulnerability.
A healthy friend can share their authentic self with you, because they have self-esteem as well as boundaries. This means they’re not superficial – willing to go deep with you

✦ Trustworthy – You know you can share secrets, fears & deep thoughts because they’ll stay private, & never be used against you in any way.

Honesty & dependability are considered the most vital qualities of friendship.

✦ Honest – They’re not afraid to speak openly from the heartland can also be objective. They’re able & willing to give you their real opinion, even when they disagree with your choices, especially if they think it’s in your best interest – BUT done without either people-pleasing or trying to control you

✦ Dependable – Someone you can count on to be there when they say they will, do what they say, and be willing to stand up for you, especially when you can’t stand up for yourself

✦ Generous – Giving comes naturally between best friends, with each person willing to share what they have with the other. A true friendship has boundaries, but abundance is key. No tabs are kept on who gives & who receives – or how much – creating a flow of sharing & caring

✦ Fun to be around – A healthy friend generally has a positive attitude, is quick to laugh, & makes you feel good just to be around them. They often lift you up, wanting to enjoy life with you.

Someone you’re compatible with shares your sense of humor. Rolling on the floor laughing ’till your stomach hurts doesn’t happen with just anyone.

A true friend laughs with you – They have experiences with you that don’t always require words, but even in the hard times you’ll laugh your way through it together. Between the personal jokes & shared experiences, your bestie knows how to tickle your funny bone.

2. COMPASSIONATE
✦ Love us unconditionally – A healthy friend loves you in spite of your imperfections – if they’re not overriding & self-destructive. They can overlook these flaws, knowing it doesn’t represent all of who you are. They can see your Real Self, accepting that we all come with baggage

A true friend sees your blind spots & unattractive habits, & isn’t afraid to call you out on them. They can sit you down & say “Listen, I see some things you need to take a look at!” They’re honest, but it’s done in a loving way

✦ Not judgmental – A real friend has a way of helping you through tough times without shame or judgment. They know your true essence, & have faith that you have the intelligence & guts to get back on track. They will give you a hug, listen without giving advice, help you get back on solid ground, & laugh with you about it when it’s over

✦ Keeps you humble – We all want to brag a little (or a lot) over the top – your kids, your job, what you have.… A true friend will celebrate you & yours, but also remind you of your values. You’re not better than the next person, so they encourage being realistic

✦ Quick to forgive & forget – A real friend accepts your apology when you mess up, & is willing to talk it thru & then move on – without guilting or shaming or hanging on to their hurt feelings. A real friend wants to heal the connection, especially when you have apologized sincerely. Your part is to be careful not to repeat the injury.

NEXT: Real Friends – #2