PREVIOUS: BDs (Part 3b) – Logical types
FOR the DATING Man : “Rock-Solid Frame Control with the Women You Like”
Frames are systems of pre-conceived ideas that allow people to quickly organize & interpret new & complex information. They function as cognitive shortcuts or “rules of thumb,” & in psychology, are known as scripts or schemata. Framing is a feature of our brain’s architecture. Our minds react to the context in which something is embedded, not just to the thing itself.
EXP: The cover influences our judgment of the book, a line appears longer when vertical than when horizontal……
Goffman, in Frame Analysis wrote that people interpret what’s going on around them in their world through their primary framework – which is taken for granted by the user. He identified 2 distinctions within primary frameworks:
❖ natural = physical events, separate from any social forces
❖ social = socially driven events, from the whims, goals & manipulations of other social players, but built on natural frameworks
EXP: If you look out of 2 different windows from the same room at a landscape outside – you’ll see 2 (maybe very) different aspects of that world. It hasn’t changed – only your perspective.
Artifact: giving objects intrinsic symbolic value
Contrast: describe an object in terms of what it is not
Euphemism : serves to soothe, distract or reduce conflict (put my dog ‘to sleep’)
Metaphor: express an idea through comparison to something else
Slogans, jargon, catchphrase: use catchy phrase to make an object more memorable & relate-able
Spin: present a concept with a value judgement (positive or negative) not immediately obvious, or create an inherent bias
Stories (myths, legends): narrative presented in a vivid & memorable way
Tradition (rituals, ceremonies): cultural values that give great meaning to the mundane, closely tied to artifacts.
🤓 Each kind of frame has several parts, making up the whole. EXPs:
• Commercial Transaction has: seller, goods, buyer, money
• Communication: message, messenger, audience, medium, images & context
• Group Therapy: therapist, clients, personal problems, suitable location ……
Re. DM & DBs
Framing Theory can help make sense of how DMs lead to DBs, because it explains that “how something is presented influences the choices people make”. ★ If you don’t ‘set the frame’ – for yourself & with others – someone else will, & whoever does – controls the situation by creating the context for everything that happens in the interaction
• Controlling our frame is not necessarily bad. In fact we all do it every day – parent to child, teacher to class, boss to employee…. It’s only bad when the frame is designed to ensnare / control another person or group.
Our personal reality is constantly changing & always includes our active participation. It’s made up of the events, experiences, objects, processes & facts we encounter, & can only be fully understood in context.
In almost any situation, we have the choice to either frame it in a positive light, or plunge it into the dark clutches of negativity. Framing things in a positive way will improve our mood & help to develop compassion for others
5 WAYS information can be framed
> Gain F – wanting certainty & positive gains, being risk-averse
> Loss F – choosing a desired goal with a significant loss rather THAN an unwanted goal with no loss at all = risk-seeking
>Temporal F – choose immediate smaller rewards over long term large ones
> Value F – respond better if info is framed as affecting what you care about
> Goal F – respond to info based on whether it helps or hinders you trying to improve your circumstances
EXP of a GAIN F. – DB communication = Mother to her child : “Be spontaneous.”
If the child then seems to do something unexpected (spontaneous), he can’t actually be acting spontaneously, because he’s following her direction.
Mother wants total control, so the child has to be put in a no-win situation, to prevent autonomy.
Subjected to this kind of communication over a long period of time, it’s easy to see how this boy could become thoroughly confused – & paralyzed.
NEXT: DBs & Frames (#4b)